See The Need – Meet The Need (Purposeful Kindness – Part 2)

 If Purposeful Acts of Kindness, as contrasted with random acts of kindness, will be accomplished, we need to see an actual need that we can meet. This requires that we see the needs and be prepared to meet those needs.

In our busy, fast-paced society, with a cultural emphasis on having our needs met versus the needs of others, it isn't easy to see needs in real-time as they occur.

So, here’s the tactic I have used in the past during the Christmas season in order to help me “See The Need”.

1.    Take a $20 bill and designate it your “Meet The Need” money. At that point, it belongs to someone else. You just don’t know who yet.

2.    Place the bill somewhere in your change purse or wallet, but apart from with your other currency. Put it somewhere prominent, where you will see it every time you access your cash or credit cards. Tag it with a paper clip or sticky note if needed.

3.    Give the money to the first person you see in need – A Purposeful Act of Kindness. You have prepared to see the need and meet the need, so there is no need to think much about the situation- just act.

See The Need – Meet The Need

It is best to prepare your $20 bill on Thanksgiving, and a couple of times, I have “reloaded” when I gave the money away the first week of December.

You may ask The Creator to place people with needs in your path if you wish, because now you are prepared to meet them.

I do realize that Christmas 2020 is the worst time to suggest this. This tactic is dependent on getting out into the masses and interacting with groups of “strangers” in multiple settings, which is severely limited this year. But here we are. It’s 2020, and everything is messed up. I know I will need to post this next year, and probably every year, for as long as possible. And I will discuss more options for your $20 at the end of the post.

 Where The $20 Tactic Originated

Several years ago, I was teaching at Indiana Wesleyan University and began that December class by telling the students my Story of the Three Turkeys. (This is a long, but interesting story about how one Christmas I ended up with three turkeys for Christmas dinner. I will tell that story next year when I have more time.) I ended the story by explaining why I give away turkeys to people in need every Christmas and that I had given away two turkeys that year. The students loved the story up to that point, but then their mood changed. 

“Don, you said you received three turkeys in the story, but this year you only gave away two. You owe someone a turkey!” They were insistent, so I promised them I would give away a third turkey.

But I knew this would be difficult to do. I had given two $20 grocery store gift cards to unemployed friends but didn’t know anyone else who needed a turkey. It was already mid-December, and I didn’t have time to get to the store for another gift card. So, I took a $20 bill, stuck it on the outside pocket of my money clip, and vowed to give it to the first person I encountered who needed help.

But no prospects crossed my path the following week, and time was running out. My last day in the office before Christmas break was Thursday, and after that, I would have little contact with anyone.

However, Tuesday morning Denette sent out an email asking people in the office to donate money for a local family with five kids whose house and Christmas gifts had been destroyed by fire a couple of days earlier.

And that was it! That was the need I was looking for! However, I had work that required my immediate attention, so I didn’t make it over to Denette’s desk until late in the day. She got out her collection envelope and I handed her the $20. She looked down at the eight dollar bills that had been donated, a meager sum considering the office had over 200 workers, and the fire's story had been prominent in the news.

 “I don’t have enough change for you,” she lamented, not raising her head.

“No, keep it all,” I said.

She quickly raises her head, and with a look of gratitude I will never forget, says, “Really?”  I nod my head; she thanks me, and I leave.

And that’s when the Christmas happens, people.

And Now, For The Rest Of The Story

But there’s more to this story. You may enjoy it – or you may not, but I gotta tell it, regardless.

That night, a few hours after donating that $20, I was at a holiday poker game with a dozen or so guys from work. It was a friendly, fun time, with a modest $20 buy-in. I haven’t played much poker, but this was by far my most bizarre game. My luck was atrocious early in the match. I should have been the first player eliminated after only a half-hour of play, but somehow, I was able to survive through tremendous luck.

My fortunes then improved a little, but an hour later, I should have been eliminated a second time but again got extremely lucky and survived. I was then able to scratch and claw back into contention. And then I won a big, essential pot that eliminated two players and left me heads up, but against a player with a massive stack of chips. He should have squashed me like a bug. But he was inexperienced and made mistake after mistake. He had several opportunities to win the match, but my chip stack kept growing because he was inept. It was almost like he wanted to lose, and finally, he made so many mistakes that they handed me over $200 when I won the match.

It was Wednesday morning when I was back at work when I fully contemplated just what had happened the previous evening. The odds of me winning that match after staving off elimination twice and defeating a much better-funded opponent at the end were minuscule. I calculated my chance of winning that match based on the challenges I faced at about 1-in-four million. But in an eight-hour span, I hand over $20 to Denette and someone hands me back around $220. I’m not entirely sure just what  happened that day. It could have been a coincidence, and yet …..

Addendum

Please put the $20 in your wallet and be ready to See The Need. If you still have the money on Christmas Eve due to limited mobility/social distancing, donate it to the Salvation Army or local food bank.

I have made the decision to put a designated $20 bill in