Corporate Loyalty Is Just Like Santa Claus

The previous post was about personal loyalty. This one deals with corporate loyalty. Well, not really, because corporate loyalty does not exist.

(I am defining “corporate” as large companies with more than, say, 100 employees. Company loyalty, at smaller organizations, can exist in some form)

Now, I know that some of you firmly believe it does exist. But believing in corporate loyalty is the adult equivalent of believing in Santa Claus. Like Santa, assuming that your corporation is loyal provides you with a warm, magical feeling. It is so comforting to think your employer is looking out for you and values you way beyond your contribution to the firm.  It is so uplifting and reassuring; it eliminates your fears knowing your job is secure and helps you sleep soundly every night.

Now please don’t respond to this concept with arguments about how corporate loyalty “does too exist!” I will view these objections with the same amusement I would listen to a five-year-old explain why Santa Claus is real. Yes, you can believe that corporate loyalty really exists. But like Santa Claus, it doesn’t, and I hate to be the one who burst your bubble.

The purpose of corporations is to generate profit. You are a resource that they use, or employ, to create that profit. Their job is to make money; you are only the means to make that money. As soon as your cost exceeds your benefit, you will be discarded. The difficulty here is you are trying to maximize your salary, which in turn increases your cost. This means the more money you make; the more your job is in danger.

Now there is some loyalty within corporations, but it is personal-based loyalty, not corporate. Usually, the person who hired you is loyal to you up to a point. But when your boss leaves the company or takes a new, non-linear position, your job is in immediate danger. Your new boss has no loyalty or vested interest in you.

The corporation wants you to believe they are indeed loyal to you because then you will be loyal to them, which is in their best interest. Remember, your parents wanted you to believe in Santa Claus, too. And it was a big, whopping lie.

Now I am not saying corporations should be loyal or even more loyal to their employees – they just aren’t. Again, it’s that profit thing. I won’t argue for the existence of corporate loyalty, just as I would not say that Santa should exist. It just doesn’t, and you are naïve if you think it does. And unlike Santa, there are costs to believing this myth. 

Then What Should I Do?

If there is no corporate loyalty, then make decisions based on what’s right for you, not good for them. Do not sacrifice your health for them. Do not sacrifice your marriage and family for them. Do not sacrifice your soul for them. You owe them your services exchanged for your salary. It is a standard business exchange, nothing more.

Be aware that you are fully responsible for managing your career. Your career path is in your hands. You alone are responsible for your success.

Therefore, always be planning your next step within the corporation or outside of it. Be developing all the skills you can because these skills are transferrable in ways you can’t even imagine. Acquire all the relevant education that is available to you. Focus it intently on where you want to go and what you want to do.

Always have a Plan B. A new boss, a buyout, a merger, an internal attack by a coworker, getting blamed for an error you did not make, and you are toast. But, but – But there is no loyalty --- none.

Continuously be planning your next move. Remember, the company is already playing the game. They are managing you. And they are trying to maximize your value, often at your expense. You better learn how to play this game, because they certainly are skilled at playing it. So, if you pretend the game doesn’t exist, then you literally get played. Like an experienced chess player, you need to be thinking several moves ahead.

Build a network of contacts before you need them. You’ve already heard that networking is important, but you’ve ignored it because it seems awkward, takes time, and is unnecessary to your current situation. However, it needs to be part of your Plan B. It is essential to meet and connect with as many people as possible to help you advance in the next step in your career plan. By networking, you are investing in yourself, just like education. If you wait until you need a network before building one, it costs you valuable time. It is challenging to drink from the well while you are drilling it.

Apology

I feel like the parent who has just destroyed the magic of Christmas for their child. Christmas wasn’t the same after you learned the truth, was it? But the deep, heavy reality is, corporate loyalty does not exist. It makes us feel good about our career choices. It provides joy when good things go our way at work. It provides us with the comfort of security, which reduces our anxiety. But it is a false security. The most dangerous lies are the ones that we most want to believe. And I am sorry to have to reveal the truth about this one.

 

 

You Have Fewer Friends Than You Think

Your circle of friends is much smaller than you think it is.

Yes, you have many people who associate with you. Maybe you have thousands of “friends” and contacts on social media. But in reality, cold reality, your real friends are few. You find out who is really on your team when you get knocked down. Some people will kick you; most will ignore you, but a select few will reach down and pull you up. Another acid test is when you ask for something that requires a time or money commitment. And sadly, that “onerous” money commitment can be as little as $10.

No, when you need or ask for help, the acquaintances and associates scatter like flies or go “radio silent”. It is indeed in times of struggle that you do find “who your true friends are”.                                                              

Loyal To A Fault

Loyalty is a concept not shared equally among persons. Very loyal people expect the same level of commitment from people they consider friends. Unfortunately, disloyal people are willing to discard friendships, even long-term friendships, as quickly as flicking away an irritating bug when the relationship is no longer convenient. Sometimes, you find out there had never really been a friendship at all, as soon as the relationship hit a stress point or you asked for some type of commitment.

This results in the loyal person wondering what they did wrong to cause the relationship to end. Followed up by the “what’s wrong with me?” question. The loyal person will impulsively try to restore what they thought was a good friendship. They will apologize. They will make excuses for the other person. They may even try to change their behavior to make it work. But this effort will fail, and then the loyal person will be deeply hurt and go through the blame game repeatedly, sometimes beating themselves up for years. But while you are doing that, the other person has forgotten all about you. They may have even forgotten your name.

What you must realize is that the friendship was always one-sided. There is nothing wrong with you, except you are too loyal. And as with everything in life, even though loyalty is a good trait, there is a price to pay for having too much. Just like being too good, too nice, too trusting, too patient ….

But the problem here is with the other person. There is something wrong with them, not you. There is nothing you could have done to save this relationship because there was never really a friendship. You were an acquaintance, to be discarded as soon as it was convenient. This person does not value you as a friend, however, you are giving value to someone who deserves no value. The person has no value – the person literally is “not worth it”. Yes, you made a poor value judgment, but now it is time for a reevaluation. Trying to hold onto something which isn’t there is like trying to hug the air. It is a futile effort.

It Still Hurts, Though

It’s always painful for the “loyalists” when a friendship evaporates. And sometimes people you liked and trusted suddenly become mean, conniving backstabbers.

At the company I worked at the longest, I thought I had made several strong friendships that would last a lifetime. However, none of these people return my messages. And these were my best work friends. I needed to get in touch with one of them this summer regarding a business issue with my book. He didn’t return my voice mails; he didn’t return my emails. Finally, I mailed a letter explaining what I needed. Crickets. This is hurtful, but I need to let this go, and stop hugging the air.

Most of the time we can’t put a value on our friendships. However, a few years ago, a person I thought was a friend sold me out for a mere $50. If a friendship is not worth $50 to you, you are not a friend; you are a mere acquaintance. The fact that I am writing about this one indicates that I am still hugging the air a bit.

It’s All About Value

We make so many value judgements that we don’t evaluate which ones are faulty. Once you spot the sell-outs, the hangers-on, the passive-aggressors, don’t try to salvage the relationships. Don’t invest anything more in them. Cut them loose.

What you must do is find the people in your inner circle. Identify those who are on your team. And then nurture, support, help, and invest in those people with everything you have. Because it is these people who will support and help you when you need it. Support me and I will support you. It is such a simple concept, and yet very few people get it. Determine who is worthy of your investment and then invest in them. If you are on my team, there are benefits to being on my team.

A Warning

Be aware. Everyone you think is a friend, is not really your friend. Most are acquaintances, and sadly, some are even your enemies, or at least they find some perverse pleasure when you fail. I wish it didn’t have to be that way, but it is one of many human frailties in this game of life.