Is Life Fair?

 THE CREATOR somehow put the concept of “fairness” in every person’s soul. You didn’t have to learn about fairness in school. The richest person on Earth believes in fairness, as does the poor African child. This is puzzling because:

LIFE IS NOT FAIR

Life doesn’t play by the rules we wish it did. If it were truly fair, then every good decision would lead to a good outcome—simple as that. You choose wisely; you live well. But reality’s messier than that. Sometimes, out of nowhere, something hits you—a drunk driver, a sudden diagnosis—and everything changes. These moments feel deeply unfair because they are. They’re random, painful, and beyond our control. 

And yet, life throws good surprises too. A lucky break, a chance meeting, a door opening when you least expect it. We often chalk those up to our talent or good fortune. But just like the bad stuff, they’re part of the unpredictable mix. Life’s not a straight line—it’s a winding road full of twists we didn’t plan for. Put it all together and

LIFE IS NOT FAIR

The odd part is that we continue to expect life to be fair when it seldom is. We are like children, tricked and tricked over again, and still expect a different outcome the next time. Now, this concept of fairness still has a purpose. It guides us in how we should treat people. We should treat them fairly. But even then, we often don’t. We usually make decisions based on selfish motives. I have written previously about how a seemingly good friend “sold me out” for a mere $50. Unfortunately, no one is exempt from this unfairness. You could dedicate your life to helping people cope with life, meeting their spiritual needs, and healing the sick, resulting in you getting tortured and crucified – you can’t get more unfair than that …

Therefore, our condition is to possess an innate sense of fairness, yet live in a world that is consistently unfair. This is a painful and frustrating part of life. Sometimes extremely unfair events happen to people we care about. At these agonizing moments, we often ask THE CREATOR, “Why?”.

My good friend’s wife recently unexpectedly passed away. Well, I have reached the “wisdom years” in that I no longer ask THE CREATOR “why?”. For one, He ain’t gonna tell me. And if He did, the reason might resemble three-dimensional, abstract calculus. Much more complex than one of those math problems that stretch over three chalkboards, and way beyond my tiny human brain’s capacity to understand. Worse yet, the explanation for this one might be “Stuff happens – you’re going to have to deal with it.”

So it is futile to ask “why?”. But this one – this one is so, so unfair. It took whatever joy I had experienced that day and sucked the life right out of me. It caused me to raise my head toward Heaven, with an expression on my face that said – “Really? This happened? How, how could this happen? How bad is this place when we have to deal with sh!+ like this? How is my friend supposed to deal with this? And what possible solace can I offer after a death so tragic?

I think there is a cultural element to dealing with death. I believe our ancestors dealt with it better because there was so much more of it. I read about a couple having ten children and losing four - yet they seemed to survive. I almost lost my first, and I still carry the pain forty years later.

We expect the world to be fair because THE CREATOR is fair and has inserted that sense of fairness into our souls. However, this fair CREATOR has placed us in a fallen world that is so often unfair. It is randomly, painfully unfair. It makes life challenging to live, tricky to navigate, and brutally painful at times.

LIFE IS NOT FAIR …

The Backstory

I first met Jeff about eight years ago. I’d read about his charity in the paper and thought, “That’s exactly the kind of organization I want to support.” So I called him up, we had a good conversation, and I ended up writing a pretty sizable check. A few days later, he invited me to lunch—he wanted to thank me and get to know the guy behind the donation. We clicked instantly. From that first meeting, it felt like we were already friends.

Over time, my respect for Jeff continued to grow. Honestly, I’d put him at the top of the list of people I admire most—maybe the top. We’d meet for lunch three or four times a year, and I continued to support his work. What made our friendship unique was that we didn’t share any mutual friends. That gave us a kind of freedom. Jeff could talk to me about things he couldn’t share with others—most of his friends were tied to his job, and he needed someone outside that circle. He trusted me, and I trusted him. We both knew that whatever was said between us stayed between us.

One day, he opened up about his divorce. It had happened ten years earlier, and it was rough—really rough. I knew I was only hearing his side, but Jeff’s not the type to embellish. He’s logical, honest, and deeply thoughtful. The whole thing had left a mark on him, so I was surprised when he told me he was ready to start looking for a new partner.

Then he laid out his standards. And let me tell you, they were high. But that’s Jeff—he’s a high-quality guy, so it makes sense he’d be looking for someone exceptional. I listened, nodding, but in my head I was thinking, “This woman doesn’t exist. Not in Northeast Ohio. Maybe not anywhere.” Especially considering the demands his job would place on her.

But then—six months later—he told me he’d found her. He was in love. I was skeptical, sure, but my faith leaves room for miracles. And this felt like one. They got married not long after, and Jeff adored her.

I only met Tanya twice. Each time, she greeted me with this radiant smile—probably because Jeff had talked me up so much. He tends to overstate my goodness, conveniently ignoring my flaws. But Tanya was everything he said she was: warm, gentle, full of light. You could feel it. Jeff had the faith to search for her, and I truly believe THE CREATOR brought them together.

And then…

One evening, after what had been a perfectly normal day, I got an email from Jeff. Tanya had passed away. Four weeks earlier. A common virus, a possible mistake, a fluke occurrence – whatever, and just like that—she was gone.

I stared at my screen, stunned. Tears welled up. I’ve never been hit this hard by the death of someone I barely knew. It felt so unfair. So senseless. I looked upward and thought, “What is this? How are we supposed to deal with something like this? How do we recover from something so… I don’t even have the words.”

I couldn’t respond back right away. I had no words. The next morning, I sent a short message: “I mourn for you.” That’s all I could manage. I told him I’d be here to talk whenever he was ready, knowing full well it might be a while. He is recovering better than I thought he would, being a strong person of faith.

Life has a way of making us hope for fairness, doesn’t it? We step into the world expecting things to balance out—good effort gets rewarded, kindness gets returned. But more often than not, what we get doesn’t match what we hoped for. That gap between expectation and reality? That’s one of the toughest parts of the human experience.

The truth is, life isn’t going to bend itself to meet our sense of justice. It’s not wired that way. So instead of waiting for the world to change, we have to shift how we see it. Adjusting our expectations isn’t giving up—it’s learning how to walk through the mess with a little more peace.

 

 

 

THE FACTORY

 Every weekday for as long as I lived in our house, my father awoke at 5:30 a.m. to get ready for his 7:00 a.m. shift at THE FACTORY. Occasionally, I would arise before he departed. He would be smoking a cigarette, finishing his last cup of coffee, and reading the newspaper. We wouldn’t talk much since I was interfering with his routine. At some point, he would look at the clock, gather his black lunchbox and Thermos, and be off. He would return around 3:30 each day.

I didn’t know what happened at THE FACTORY until one day my mother explained that my dad made “wheels and brakes for airplanes.” She told me this so I could answer the question if asked by the kids at school or anyone else. My mother was not proud of my father’s job. She had married significantly below her social standing. She probably told people company name, which was highly respected, but was coy about him being a factory worker. I, however, was extremely proud of my father’s vocation. I may not have understood why planes needed wheels, but they needed to stop, and my dad made the brakes to stop them.

I was never inside THE FACTORY, but I did know what it looked like from the outside. Occasionally, in the summer, we would drive by THE FACTORY. My mom challenged me to locate my dad’s car in the crowded parking lot, more than a hundred yards from the highway. I was ecstatic the day I spotted it, and once I knew where he parked, it was easy to do. 

Other than that, I didn’t think much about THE FACTORY, but I should have. It was THE FACTORY that fed me, clothed me, and put the roof over my head. It was THE FACTORY that provided a stable, middle-class existence, allowing me to sleep soundly every night. It was THE FACTORY that paid my college tuition, so, ironically, I never had to work a single day in a factory. THE FACTORY was life-giving – from the day I was born until I moved out at age 22.

Soon after I left, my father retired from THE FACTORY with almost 40 years of service. He earned a gold watch for his time there, an oddity for a factory worker. I still have the watch. I don’t know the intrinsic value. That doesn't matter because it's not for sale at any price.

THE FACTORY was sold to another firm in 1987 to fend off a corporate raider. THE FACTORY had a new owner again in 1996. In 2016, that company closed THE FACTORY, and hundreds of workers lost their jobs. And hundreds of children lost their life-giving force, and didn’t sleep soundly for many nights. After more than 75 years of providing life-giving benefits to thousands of people, THE FACTORY lay dead.

But the demise of THE FACTORY was not unique. U.S. factory employment peaked at 19.5 million workers in 1979 and has declined by 34% to around 12.8 million today. Thousands of factories have been shuttered, while manufacturing continues to flourish around the world. Of course, there are several reasons for the decline, such as productivity gains and technological advancements. But that can’t fully explain a 34% decrease in the U.S., when worldwide manufacturing increased at an estimated 135%.

 

A Resuscitation Attempt

Now, there is an attempt to stop the loss of manufacturing jobs and actually increase the number of factories in the U.S. The critics howl that the jobs are “gone for good” and will never return. Well, the one sure way that will happen is to continue doing nothing. If you continue to sit idly by, that 34% decrease will accelerate as the world's share of manufacturing continues to increase. We have literally "done nothing” for over 30 years, and that has gotten us to this point. This is the best argument for “doing something” that you can find.

That something involves tariffs. Tariffs are criticized as being ineffective and disruptive in every economic textbook. Of course, none of the eggheads writing these textbooks have ever worked in a factory, and few have relied on a factory for income. Politicians scream that tariffs are bad, supported by lobbyist money generated from the importation of cheap goods.

Now we learn that almost every country already imposes its own tariffs against U.S.-made goods. If tariffs are so bad, why are they used so much? You can argue that tariffs contradict the principles of "free trade." However, if no one is following the rules, then there are no rules. You can argue for “fair trade”, but that is also a myth. How is it fair to humanity when many products sold in this country are produced by what is essentially “slave labor”? In a country where we are still grappling with the impact of the plantations, which existed for purely economic reasons, there are descendants of domestic slaves walking our streets wearing shoes made by slaves overseas. How many things are wrong with that picture?  

There is no fair trade because every country is out for its own best interest – it is what seems fair to them. Every country is fighting a trade war. If you choose not to fight, you get slaughtered – and the U.S. was getting decimated.

I’m not interested in all the analyses and commentaries on how these awful tariffs won’t work. Most of these are heavily biased due to the current hyper-politicized culture in which we live. They don’t really matter much at this point, do they? The tariffs have already begun and will either work or fail, regardless of the so-called experts’ opinions. It would be so much better if these gurus would concentrate on how these tariffs might work to our benefit instead of predicting economic calamity.

The tariffs are happening whether you approve of them or not, and it doesn’t matter your political bent. Yes, support our team even if you despise the quarterback.

If you are trying to create more factories in this country – go for it! If you are trying to give opportunities for mothers and fathers to provide better lives for their children - go for it with all your might. If you are mildly successful, it will be worth it. If you are wildly successful, maybe even THE FACTORY could live again.

 

 

 

 

 

Getting A Second Chance

 Second chances in life are of great value because they tend to be rare. Second chances are needed as a result of some failure. Sometimes, the failure is so pronounced that no one is willing to give you another opportunity, or you don't even want to try again.

To receive a second chance, someone has to have faith in your ability to succeed this time. Usually, they are taking a personal risk by giving you this opportunity. If you didn’t seek the second chance, the person giving it to you has more faith in you than you do in yourself. Regardless, anyone granting you a second chance deserves your deep gratitude for believing in you.

 My Second Chance

From 1997 to 2002, I performed Christian stand-up comedy locally in addition to my day job. I didn’t consider myself a successful comedian, and I “retired” in 2002 when my bookings dried up. For the next 22 years, I thought of myself as a failure. Such a failure, that I never had a desire to perform Christian comedy ever again.

In August 2022, I began performing regular stand-up comedy as a way to sell my humor books. I wasn’t really committed to this because I was too busy writing my next book, so it didn’t go well. By mid-2024, I had not been on stage in over six months, and I doubted I would ever perform comedy again.

It has been said that “God is the God of second chances.” In May 2024, it was apparent to me, as well as some of my close confidants, that God was calling me back to the Christian comedy stage. I still had no desire to do this, but God can be rather persuasive. In late September, I became a Christian comedian once again. I now have a second chance.

 

But What About That First Failure?

I was confused as to why God would call me back after 22 years to something I had failed at before. But my failure was not all that it seemed. After I stopped performing, I learned that 2002 was a brutal year for performers because people stayed home much more after the events of 9-11. So, the failure wasn't so much based on my talent as it was the circumstances.

To prepare for my resurgence, I had to listen to my performances from 22 years ago. I was supposed to be listening to the content of my old material. Still, all I could hear was the audience laughing loudly and enjoying themselves. I had to stop the recordings several times and sob. For 22 years, I thought I was a bad comic, but I wasn’t. I don’t know how good I was, but I know I was good enough that God has now put me back in the game.     

So, my failure wasn’t as much based on my ability as much as not being patient enough to stick it out. Sometimes in life, circumstances are the main reason you fail, and there is no way to change that.

 

The Faith Part

I never once asked for or sought this second chance. Therefore, I do not believe I have been given a second chance – but have been gifted a second chance. It is a gift, and I don’t deserve it. And Someone evidently has enough faith in me to gift me this second chance. Yes, God has more faith in me than I have in myself. Oooh, now here is the profound part. God has more faith in you than you do in yourself. Again, let that sink in: God has more faith in you than you do in yourself. For emphasis, GOD HAS MORE FAITH IN YOU THAN YOU DO IN YOURSELF – no matter how many times you have failed.

 

My Response

Yes, it is great to get a second chance, but you still have to take advantage of the opportunity. You must put tremendous effort into it because the effort you exerted the first time did not result in a successful outcome. Even though I never expected to receive this opportunity, I am fully committed to it. Second chances are of great value because they are so rare. And gifts from God are even rarer.